Judgment..
This word fills me with fury. I feel like screaming, ‘Who the hell you are to judge me?’
I am not going to listen to you. I respect only my authority. Oh! Did I sound like a self-obsessed dictator? It was not intended to be. I apologize. During the course of the article my mental frame would get clear to you.
The earliest times in my life I can think of, I was in lower K.G. I went to school and there was some sports day. They made me run for some 50 m race. My classmates were full of enthusiasm. Even I was. I never knew what winning meant that time. I was all set to go. A whistle was blown and people start running. After running for a while I stopped. I was too tired and found it a bit boring as well. In 2 mints I had a cocktail of emotions. It was fatigue, thrill, enthusiasm, self-pity (for doing such a stupid task).By the time it ended, I realized I was the last one. Teachers were congratulating the winner. A dumb ass who use to tease me all the time for my short stature This was the first time I learnt words like Competition, fame, and judgment and these words evolved into new set of words like peer pressure. He again teased me and said here you are again last as always. I was speechless. I realized it is not the mixture of emotions I felt during the race were important but WINNING.
It often happened with me that I was put into the tasks which I never liked and which resulted in disappointments. At one point of time I actually started thinking if there is any task which is meant for me. A natural thought which come for such moron (so called) is rigidity, inadaptability, dullness.
‘I OBJECT.’
I was simply not interested in the tasks offered to me. I did not have choices. The only way to prove my heroism was to come first in 50m or 100 m races, excel in academics and a long list goes on. That list never had my choice.
Now as a 24 year old individual, I look myself. I am happy the way I am. I have choices and options under those choices. I believe in excelling in what I choose rather than what is imposed. I still hate the word judgment as before. I should amend it a bit. ‘JUDGEMENT BY AN INCOMPETENT AUTHORITY’ under imposed circumstances. I believe in the authority which helps me in growing, learning and moving forward in life
I want to come up with my interpretation of whatever skills I learn. It would lead to innovations and discoveries each day. Waiting for a certification for my acts will not take me anywhere. Result is a byproduct. It is the ‘process’ which deserves utmost priority.
speaking of "Judgement", generally refers to the considered evaluation of evidence in the formation of making a decision' it has got something to do with comparison......there has to be a benchmark....so who sets this benchmark???who decides, who is the "best"?? so maybe our motive in life should be, to set those benchmark standards so that "my standards" which can be used to judge others...in this way one can escape judgement!!!
ReplyDeleteExactly, I think you have put the idea in a better manner. We can escape judgement.I believe the challenge is to not become what others want you to become in this uniform system of judgement.The flaw with the system is in coming upto the expectation of the system, which aims to bring uniformity or order, one oftens forgets the direction where he/she was suppose to head towards. Thus in absence of a direction, the only easily visible benchmark is the external one.
ReplyDeleteand one comment to what you said 'my standards' can never be used to judge others.Every person is unique.Before judging, definig parameters is important.
ReplyDelete