How irritating it was to see 'her' doing things so tirelessly throughout the day. Rajesh would howl,' where do you keep my office files? They just decide to vanish when your magical hands touch them'. 'She' would decide to overlook it and try to make Sia eat her breakfast, another round of rude attacks would follow. ' why are you after my life? Don't you have anything else to do in life'. Souvik would be polite,' Mommy dear, I cannot eat this food. You know my instructor has asked me to eat in olive oil and not in refined oil'. 'She' would pack the food and give it to the maid.
At 28 as Sia saw the old albums and found beautiful picture of 'her'. she could make out whose reflection she was. She saw one of those pictures of her fourth birthday in which she could see a slightly bulged abdomen. She was expecting Souvik that time; yet called all the kids for birthday celebrations.
Coming back from the hindsight, as Sia saw the frail fifty two year old gait, her heart was filled with remorse. Within the wrinkles, she was trying to find that beautiful face of the old album. She looked herself into the mirror hoping to see her mother. Sia was nowhere close to that. There could have been various faces between what Sia was and what was there in that old album. Each line telling the story of the debt Sia took from her mother and was unable to return in these years.
As she boarded the flight, the sight refused to go off her mind. She would remember how things changed for her. How she switched from visiting home from ten days in a month to ten days in an year. Life changed. How she would gave an extempore on self dependence and freedom and like a coward could not give away her own dependedce on those 'pillars' of her life. Probably she thought they would stay there forever and in the meanwhile she could experiment with life.
Now when she sees the pillars weakening, she misses focussing on the nuances of life. She wishes if she could have seen the mico and not macro. She wished she could have learnt 'mathematics' from her mathematician father.
At 28 as Sia saw the old albums and found beautiful picture of 'her'. she could make out whose reflection she was. She saw one of those pictures of her fourth birthday in which she could see a slightly bulged abdomen. She was expecting Souvik that time; yet called all the kids for birthday celebrations.
Coming back from the hindsight, as Sia saw the frail fifty two year old gait, her heart was filled with remorse. Within the wrinkles, she was trying to find that beautiful face of the old album. She looked herself into the mirror hoping to see her mother. Sia was nowhere close to that. There could have been various faces between what Sia was and what was there in that old album. Each line telling the story of the debt Sia took from her mother and was unable to return in these years.
As she boarded the flight, the sight refused to go off her mind. She would remember how things changed for her. How she switched from visiting home from ten days in a month to ten days in an year. Life changed. How she would gave an extempore on self dependence and freedom and like a coward could not give away her own dependedce on those 'pillars' of her life. Probably she thought they would stay there forever and in the meanwhile she could experiment with life.
Now when she sees the pillars weakening, she misses focussing on the nuances of life. She wishes if she could have seen the mico and not macro. She wished she could have learnt 'mathematics' from her mathematician father.
